Cause You Were Made Perfect, Babe
by precious-passenger
Summary: Set in the beginning of Season one. Title with a slight change from Lady Gaga's "Born this Way " "There's a big difference between being proud of yourself, that brief minute you look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself "Yeah, I'm awesome", than not caring about all the trash talk you endure every single day"


He should be used to it by now. It's like he had a big neon sign of "teen gay approaching" on his forehead and… fuck, the raised eyebrows as they took in his appearance or his voice, judging , always judging, was just becoming too much. The words of "I'm gay" hadn't even been spoken in McKinley yet, only hushed, terrified whispers in Mercedes' ears.

Kurt had always been very considerate about what he was going to say. He was brought up that way. His mother had always taught him never say anything that might be offending or might hurt others feelings. To always think before speaking. Never say something that you're not sure it's appropriate.

It was common sense.

Hell, his father was the bright example of that. He had watched from young age, customers after customers pour in Hummel's garage, drivers who had tried to fix the car themselves but left the car even more damaged than it already was. Burt would listen to them without a single judgment, even though he probably was mentally pulling out his hair by roots, partly because he had none, at their stupidity.

High school is tough as it is. No one wants to be singled out there. Nobody wanted to walk in the hallways and have it fall into silence, people parting from their way, looking away, well, unless they were popular and those students did all that because they were jealous, not disgusted.

There's a big difference between being proud of yourself, that brief minute you look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself "Yeah, I'm awesome", than not caring about all the trash talk you endure each day.

But to be singled out in the class, by the teacher of all people, was beyond hurtful. Kurt had heard snickers and chuckles now and then. She'd locked eyes with him several times as if taunting him "You're not one of those gays now, are you?" and Kurt wanted to stand up right there and shout "yeah I am. But even if I wasn't, you're a moron to say such offending things without a single thought of your audience." Fuck it; he wanted to shove it in her face, his apparent gayness. He wanted to just grab the nearest boy, who was homeless Brett at the moment, not that he had any preferences about the boys in the class, they were beyond unattractive by laughing like hyenas at teacher's silly tone, and make out with him for a couple of minutes, and then leave the class, the school, without a backward glance and never ever come back.

Didn't she get it? The world is not just 0 or 1. You are never a hundred percent right. And everyone who doesn't agree with you isn't hundred percent wrong.

He never wanted to get out of Lima any more than he felt in that moment. Right there in that class Kurt knew he would never truly belong, with all those students stupidly laughing at overused anti-gay jokes.

But he stood there and took it. He listened to all the rant which then turned into racist and religious quips after bashing gay rights for a good couple of minutes. He didn't rush out of the class as the bell rang. His face showed nothing but collected calmness. He even took the shove in the lockers without a single care. But then he spent all the lunch period sitting on the toilet's lid, with cubicle walls and a hand full of tissues as his company, crying his eyes out.

He wished he could sue the teacher, screw it, the whole school. He wished the recorded tape he secretly made was something more than a heartbreak. But here at McKinley, teachers never really got fired, just transferred from a subject to another or more often than not the complaints were ignored. He knew it was no use. And fuck, he was tired of fighting this, with every single person.

At least he had a safe home and a loving father, he comforted himself. A father who wouldn't bat an eye as he belted out high F-s or that he had pants in all colors of rainbow. Someone who had assured him that he wouldn't care less which god he'll pray to, if not any, or in a few years he would be a bundle of nerves introducing a boyfriend to him. Kurt knew very few were blessed with this support and he should thank all his lucky stars for that. He didn't know how he'd go through each day without his dad.

His face had that far away look all day, and those who cared to spare a glance would notice cried out eyes and quivering lips.

Maybe there was no hope for this shit – hole of a town but that in no way meant that it was bound to be one disappointing journey for one Kurt Hummel.

* * *

A/N: So simply put, I had a shit day today. A teacher in the university basically made me want to cry right there in the middle of the class. I still want to cry. But making Kurt cry was my only option, sadly.


End file.
